The Art of Wooing
by Kelcat
Summary: A night of over-indulging and some unhelpful advice from a friend causes Anders to attempt to woo an unsuspecting rogue.


The prompter wanted an AU modern-day Karaoke bar fic, but they got a drunken night in Denerim with Anders singing Elvis instead. ((Why do I do this, again?))

* * *

Nate was feeling comfortably numb. The Wardens had been in Denerim for over a week now, and they had finally convinced the Commander to come out with them for a 'night on the town'. It had been difficult tearing Elissa away from the Queen, but Anders had finally won over her by saying they needed to celebrate finally being back in civilization. He had never liked rural Amaranthine—too much dirt and too many trees, he said.

After several requests, Anora had finally relented and allowed Elissa to re-establish the Warden base in Denerim. It had been months since the siege of Amaranthine and Vigil's Keep and the Commander of the Grey felt it was time for them to rebuild the Wardens in earnest.

Elissa had already privately discussed with Nathaniel that she would be staying here in Denerim and he would go back to take command of Vigil's Keep. She was tired of being away from Anora, she said, and the life of a Grey Warden was too short to waste. She wanted to spend as much time as she could with her beloved wife.

Despite the fact that it had taken many pleas and threats to get the Commander to go out with them tonight, she seemed to be enjoying herself. They had chosen a small out-of-the-way tavern near the docks rather than the Gnawed Noble, as Elissa hated having to socialize with other noblemen. The ale wasn't as good here, but it seemed to be doing its job well enough.

Anders had made a bet with Oghren that he could drink the dwarf under the table, and amazingly enough the mage was keeping up fairly well. Nate, as usual, was content to just sit and watch the goings-on around him. He had had a couple pints of ale—just enough to relax him, but not enough to get him drunk. He had seen Thomas over-indulge too many times for it to hold any appeal for him.

They were several hours into the night, and they had gotten to the point where most everyone was letting loose a little too much. Oghren was singing some sort of song that apparently explained why hedgehogs were actually very fortunate creatures.

Anders was trying to teach Sigrun and Elissa how to dance something he called the 'Spicy Shimmy'.

"No, no, no!" Anders yelled. "You jump to the left once, then step right, and _then_ you swing your hips around. Like this:" He proceeded to do a few complicated moves that seemed vaguely like what he had been explaining, all the while with his arms held out from his sides. Nate didn't know if that was part of the dance or if Anders was just trying to keep from falling over. He supposed it didn't really matter.

Oghren was up on the small stage sometimes used by musicians, waving his tankard of ale and singing at the top of his lungs.

"—_with a snail, if you slow to a crawl, but the hedgehog can never be buggered at—"_

Laughing and trying to catch her breath, Elissa plopped down on the bench next to Nate. "I give up! I'm too drunk for this."

"Spoil sport!" Anders shouted over at her.

Glaring at him, she jumped up on the stage and began singing with Oghren. Nate took a moment to admire his Commander. She had released her thick chestnut hair from its usual bun and it fell down her back in loose curls. With her high cheekbones and full lips she truly was a beautiful woman. Not for the first time, Nate found himself mourning the fact that she was married.

A fact which didn't seem to deter Anders in the slightest. He took great pleasure in flirting with Elissa every chance he got. To her credit, she gave it back as good as she got, but Nate knew she'd never be unfaithful to Anora.

Nate noticed that Anders and Sigrun had adjourned to a table in the far corner of the bar. They seemed to be deep in discussion, and by the frown on Anders' face the subject was serious. Curious as to what had the mage looking so down, he went to the bar on the pretense of getting another pint of ale. Drink acquired, he used his talents to fade from view and sat down at an empty table near where the two Wardens were sitting.

"s'not fair y'know" Anders seemed to be having difficulty speaking clearly, "I've fallen in love with the most amazing rogue in the Keep. But I don't stand a chance," he shook his head morosely, "not a sodding chance."

This was interesting. Nate knew that Anders thought their Commander was attractive, but he had no idea the mage had such a crush on her. At least, he assumed that's who Anders was talking about, seeing as he had used the term 'rogue'.

"Why not?" Sigrun asked as she grabbed the table to keep from falling backwards off of her chair.

"Well, 'm a mage aren't I? Mages don't…don't fall in love. No point—least not for me. I mean, I mean, I mean" Anders lost his train of thought for a moment, "—I was trying to get _out_ of the Tower. No use me having something worth staying for if I'm just gonna leave."

"But you're not in the Tower anymore," Sigrun pointed out, "and maybe your rogue likes mages. Have you even asked?"

"Maker, no!" Anders looked shocked. "Why would I do that?"

Sigrun raised an eyebrow. "So you're just gonna sit around and be miserable and never tell this person you're in love with 'em?"

Anders nodded. "That was the plan, yeah."

"Nope, nuh uh," Sigrun shook her head. "You gotta say it, even if you get rejected. I mean, this could be the love of your life—but you'll never know if you don't say something."

"Dunno what to say," Anders said glumly, "I mean, how would I even go about it?"

"You could try wooing."

"How do I do that?" Anders asked warily.

"You've never wooed someone before?" Sigrun asked incredulously. "You're not a virgin are you?"

"Course not," Anders looked indignant, "but we didn't exactly _court_ each other in the Tower. It was more along the lines of 'Nice fire spell, wanna fuck'?"

Unseen, Nathaniel started coughing as he choked on the sip of ale he had just taken.

Anders looked at the dwarf desperately. "You gotta help me, Sigrun, I don't know what to do."

Sigrun appeared to think for a minute. "Its gotta be something romantic. Like a serenade."

"Really?" Anders asked, dubiously.

"Sure, everyone likes being made to feel special."

"Can't I just say something like 'Nice bracers, wanna fuck?'"

"You think that'll work?" Sigrun asked curiously.

Anders sighed mournfully. "Doubtful."

"Alright then, a song it is."

Anders looked panicky. "What, now?"

Sigrun nodded firmly. "If nothing else it'll get Oghren to stop singing about that damn hedgehog."

With a deep breath Anders got up from the table and walked unsteadily over to the stage.

Nate had to see this. Uncloaking himself, he went to sit down at the table next to Elissa. His fellow rogue looked over at him questioningly.

"Why are you grinning?" she asked.

Nate nodded toward the small stage. "I think we're about to have some new entertainment."

Oghren was still singing his song at the top of his lungs, swaying dangerously.

"_Or with a giraffe if you stand on a stool—"_

Anders unceremoniously shoved Oghren to the side of the stage where he promptly passed out. Nate watched as the mage stood there, frozen, breathing heavily. He pinched his eyes shut, opened his mouth as if to speak, then closed it again.

Nate changed his mind, he couldn't watch this. He buried his face in his hand, unable to watch Anders make an ass out of himself to the Commander. The man _knew_ he had no chance with Elissa, so why was he doing this?

Finally, after a few minutes of agonizing silence, Anders began to sing in a somewhat quavery and extremely off-pitch voice that made Nate wonder if the mage was tone-deaf.

"_Wise men say_

_only fools rush in_

_but I can't help_

_falling in love with you…"_

Nate finally dared to look at the Commander to see her reaction to this impromptu performance. To his surprise, instead of watching Anders she was staring at _him_, her mouth forming an 'o' of surprise. Confused, Nate turned to look at Anders, who was also looking straight at him—a look of intense concentration on his face.

Anders began walking toward him—balance still unsteady—and continued to sing.

"_Shall I stay_

_would it be a sin_

_if I can't help falling in love with you…"_

With growing horror Nate suddenly realized what was going on. When Sigrun and Anders were talking about a 'rogue', they hadn't been talking about Elissa, they had been talking about _him._ Nate pressed himself into the back of his chair as Anders continued his slow but steady advance towards him.

"_Like a river flows, surely to the sea_

_darlin' so it goes, some things are meant to be…"_

Anders sat down in Nate's lap, straddling his legs.

"_Take my hand, take my whole life too_

_for I can't help falling in love. With. You."_

When Anders finished the song their faces were so close together that their noses were almost touching. As Anders began to lean forward Nate finally snapped out of the hypnotized state he had fallen into. He placed his hands on Anders' chest, halting the mage's forward movement.

"Anders, stop." He commanded, his voice shaking just a bit.

"Uh uh," Anders murmured, his voice husky, "Sigrun said I haveta…haveta…woo you."

He could hear the dwarf sniggering. "Say the thing about the bracers," she suggested.

_Oh, please, Maker—don't let him say that_. Nate didn't think he'd be able to handle that. His face was _already_ bright red.

"Anders," Nate said slowly, "you're drunk. I'm very flattered but—"

He was cut off as Anders thrust his pelvis against the rogue's hips. _Maker!_ Nate stood up quickly, practically dumping Anders on the floor. Something—disappointment? Hurt?—flashed across Anders' face before he grinned sheepishly.

"Can't blame a man for trying, right?" He laughed good-naturedly before using the edge of the table to pull himself to his feet.

Nate felt like an ass as he sat back down. He definitely could have handled that better. It was just that he'd been taken completely off guard by the mage's actions.

He noticed Anders smack Sigrun on the back of the head on his way over to the bar. "Thanks for the tips," he hissed.

Nate felt even worse when he saw Anders gulp down a couple shots of some unknown amber liquid. But when the mage came back to the table he seemed perfectly fine. Anders and Sigrun got into a discussion about whether or not it actually would have been comfortable to fly on the back of a griffon, but both seemed to lose their trains of thought several times.

Every so often Anders would glance over at Nate, grinning at him and looking as if he was mentally undressing the rogue. Nate figured it was better than being glared at, but it still made him distinctly uncomfortable—for several different reasons.

The alcohol seemed to be making Anders bold again and he moved to sit down next to Nate.

"D'you know," Anders asked as he rested his head on Nate's shoulder, "you have the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. They're grey like…like…something grey."

Nate stared at him nonplussed. "I think," he said, shifting a little away from the mage, "you need to go to bed and sleep this off."

"Don't wanna go to bed," Anders pouted.

Nate stood up and pulled Anders to his feet. "Well, you're going, whether you want to or not."

Anders scowled at him. "Fine. But if I wake up in a ditch tomorrow it's all your fault." With that, he turned and staggered towards the door, stumbling into nearly everything—and everyone—he passed.

Nate rolled his eyes and went after him.

Anders had managed to get the door open and was trying to navigate the short step from the door to the street. Nate reached the mage and put an arm around his waist.

"Here, put your arm over my shoulders."

Anders looked at him gratefully and did as he was told.

The walk back to the Palace was quiet, Anders seemingly needing to focus all of his concentration on putting one foot in front of the other. Nate suspected that Anders was leaning against him a little more than he strictly needed to, but it wasn't necessarily an unpleasant sensation.

Eventually they managed to make it back to the compound where the Wardens were staying. Once inside, though, Nate paused.

"Where's your room, Mage?"

Anders was still leaning most of his weight on the rogue and was nuzzling Nate's neck. Nate had to repeat the question twice more before Anders finally paid attention.

"Don't remember. It's…down a hallway, I think," Anders replied, unhelpfully.

Nate sighed. He'd just have to take Anders to his own room. It didn't really matter where the mage slept off the alcohol, after all. Nate could dump him on the bed and find somewhere else to sleep. If worse came to worst he could always throw a couple of blankets on the floor in front of the hearth.

It took them several minutes to reach Nate's room on the second floor as Anders had difficulty navigating the stairs. Eventually Nate just picked the mage up and threw him over his shoulder. Luckily, Anders didn't weigh very much and Nate was able to get him to the room without dropping him.

He got Anders onto the bed and reached over him to grab a pillow to use on the floor. Quick as lightning, Anders grabbed Nate's arm and pulled him onto the bed. Before Nate realized what was going on, Anders was kissing him.

Nate opened his mouth to protest and Anders took the opportunity to thrust his tongue inside the rogue's mouth. The kiss was sloppy, and Nate could smell the ale on Anders' breath. He sat there for a moment, unsure of what to do. This was wrong, he knew it. Anders was too drunk, and it would be wrong to take advantage of this. Wouldn't it?

But, Maker, Anders' lips felt so good and Nate soon found himself kissing the mage back. Anders tugged Nate's bottom lip through his teeth and Nate groaned at the sensation. He twined his fingers into that soft blond hair and pressed Anders backwards onto the bed.

He should leave right now, before this went any further. He pulled back, with every intention of walking out the door, but then Anders rubbed his leg against Nate's groin and he was lost. To hell with it; he'd worry about the consequences in the morning. Anders had stirred something inside him, and his desire finally overrode his common sense.

Nate stretched out on top of Anders, pressing their bodies together. Anders moved his kisses to Nate's jaw line before sliding his tongue along the shell of his ear.

"I want you, Nathaniel," Anders murmured, "I want to feel you inside me."

_Oh, Maker_. The words went into Nate's ear and straight to his groin. He tightened his grip in Anders' hair and pulled him in for another deep kiss. Their teeth clacked together as their tongues dueled, and Nate ran his hand along Anders' thigh up to the laces at his waist.

He had to pull away from the kiss in order to focus on untying the complicated web of laces and sashes that bound the mage's robes together. Anders tried to help at first, but the alcohol was affecting his coordination. Instead, he slipped his hands up Nate's shirt and began rubbing them along the rogue's back.

Nate ran out of patience trying to untie the tight knots and grabbed at the dagger he always kept on the table by his bed. It was the work of a few moments to slice through the bindings. Once the robes were loose he pulled them off and dumped them unceremoniously on the floor. Anders didn't seem to object to Nate's destruction of his robes, apparently equally impatient.

Anders began tugging Nate's shirt up his chest and it quickly joined Anders' robes on the floor. Anders immediately set to work on the laces of Nate's breeches which luckily weren't knotted as tight. Nate flipped onto his back and tugged off his breeches and smallclothes, while Anders rid himself of the rest of his clothing.

Both men successfully unclothed, Nate pulled Anders into a kiss as his hands roamed up and down the mage's body. He hissed as Anders wrapped a hand around his erection and began stroking it. He buried his face in Anders' hair, lost to the sensation of Anders' hand around him.

It had been many years since he'd shared pleasure of this kind with another man, since before he was sent to the Free Marches. Of course, taking pleasure in other men was _why_ he had been sent away—his father disgusted with the idea that his eldest son would be so _deviant_. He had held himself back for so long, denied the attraction he felt towards other men, convinced that if he buried it far enough he could somehow rid himself of his desires.

He had been so successful at his endeavor that he hadn't even realized his attraction to Anders, at least not until tonight. And he found himself wondering for the first time in years if perhaps his father had been wrong, if perhaps it would be all right for him to give in to what he wanted.

And the mage's hands felt so good on his body, how could this be _bad_? He tugged at Anders' bottom lip with his teeth as he clutched Anders' backside. Anders moaned in appreciation and quickened his strokes.

Nate pulled back and moved to leave the bed. He chuckled when Anders gave a small noise of disappointment and he kissed the mage lightly on the lips. "Just wait a moment," he murmured. He went over to the trunk near the window, searching it for something they could use. At last he found a bottle of the oil he used on his leathers.

When he returned to the bed, Anders immediately took the bottle from his hand and unstoppered it before pouring some of the slippery oil onto Nate's fingers. Nate slowly pressed one finger into Anders' entrance, lightly stroking him. Anders rocked his hips against Nate's finger, encouraging him to push deeper.

As Nate added another finger, gently stretching the other man, Anders poured more oil into his own hand and began coating Nate's length with it. Anders' impatience was intoxicating and Nate found he could wait no longer.

Removing his fingers, Nate slowly pushed into the mage, trying to adjust to the tight heat pressing around him. Anders pulled his legs up so he was bent almost double. The change in position had Nate thrusting deeper and his moans mingled with those of Anders' as Nate hit that sensitive spot inside him over and over.

Nate tried to set a slow rhythm but Anders would have none of it. Pulling Nate down to him Anders bit down hard on the rogue's neck, causing him to buck his hips.

"More, Nate," Anders panted, "_please_."

Nate looked at him questioningly. "What—?"

Anders thrust his hips up into Nate. "_Harder_. I want to feel you, _all_ of you" He clenched his muscles around Nate's length.

Nate gasped, as much at Anders' words as the feeling of Anders tightening around him. He let go of his ever-present control and began thrusting into the mage, pulling almost completely out before plunging back in roughly.

Anders keened in pleasure, rocking his hips in time with Nate's hard thrusts. His hands were tightened around Nate's biceps, and the feeling of nails biting into his skin pushed Nate on. Hands firmly gripping Anders' hips, Nate picked up the pace, his movements becoming more frantic as he neared the edge.

Nate moved a hand to grasp at Anders' erection, pumping it in time with the thrusts of his hips, wanting to bring Anders over before he came himself.

"Ah, Nate, _Nate! _Oh, Maker, _yes!_" Anders cried out as he reached his climax, spilling into Nate's hand. Hearing his name cried out in pleasure pushed Nate over the edge and he snapped his hips once, twice, before finally releasing deep inside Anders with a cry of pure ecstasy.

Gasping for breath, Nate slowly eased out of Anders and collapsed backwards onto the bed. Anders rolled over and rested his head against the rogue's chest, one arm stretched across his torso. Both men were panting hard and slicked with sweat.

As Nate began regaining his senses he heard Anders' breathing slow. Turning his head to look, he saw that the mage was fast asleep. Nate smiled softly and ran his fingers through Anders' hair, tucking the stray locks behind his ear. He soon gave in to the pull of exhaustion and fell into a deep sleep.

Nate awoke the next morning to the feeling of Anders snuggled up against him. He opened his eyes and saw the mage was looking at him, a smile on his lips.

"Morning," Anders said, softly, "sleep well?"

Nate nodded uncertainly, surprised at such a cheerful greeting. "You're not…wondering why I'm in your bed?"

Anders looked at him curiously. "Course not. You're far too gentlemanly to run out in the middle of the night." He grinned.

Nate cleared his throat. "I thought maybe you wouldn't remember…"

"Andraste's ass, Nate, how could I forget something like that?"

Nate looked dubious. "You had a lot to drink…"

Anders laughed. "I have a feeling it would take several large kegs of Oghren's ale to make me forget sex that amazing."

Nate cleared his throat. "Amazing?"

Anders nodded, smiling softly. His expression became more serious. "You aren't—you don't regret last night, do you?" He looked at Nate anxiously, biting his lower lip.

Nate shook his head and smiled at him. "No, not at all."

Anders grinned, relief evident on his face. "Good."

Nate remembered the conversation he'd overheard. "When you told Sigrun you were in love…you were talking about me, weren't you?"

Anders blushed. "You heard that? Maker, that's more embarrassing than my serenading you."

Nate laughed, "Oh, I don't know about that. The serenade _was _pretty embarrassing," he smiled at Anders, "but I liked it." He looked at the mage intently. "You didn't answer my question, though."

Anders smiled at him, cheeks still pink. "Yeah, I was talking about you."

Nate grinned. "I'm glad." He paused. "Sigrun was right, you know."

Anders looked at him curiously. "About what?"

"I do like mages. Very much." And with that he pulled Anders tight against him, kissing him warmly.


End file.
